Thursday, July 13, 2006

Unexpected Reactions

Awhile ago, the hubby got something in the mail from the Puget Sound Blood Center. We were kind of surprised and how no clue what it was, since we no longer live in that area. After opening it he was reminded of something he signed up for a LONG time ago. Years ago he signed up to be on the Bone Marrow Donor Registry when he gave blood up in Seattle. They contacted him to let him know there was a potential match of someone who needed a bone marrow transplant, and they needed to do further testing on his blood sample to see if he would be a match. So we needed to discuss it and see if that was something as a family we wanted to do. We decided that especially since he hadn't do anything on our end why not. They had a sample of his blood, they just needed his permission to test it further.
After he called and gave them the go ahead, we had a very serious discussion on what he would do if he ended up as a match. He would have to go up to Seattle for the transplant, and my parents are up there so he could stay at there house and have their help with whatever after transplant help he might need the day or two after. Was there really much of a decision to be made? If you had the opportunity to help save a life why wouldn't you, especially when it's not life threatening to you? Who we were (in a way) to tell a parent, sorry we choose not to help you out in such a tough time in your life and your child's? We decided he would do it, if all came back well with the tests. If we were in their shoes, we would EVERYONE to help us to do whatever it takes to help our child. We couldn't do that to a family if there was something so easy for him to do.
We got a letter back saying that the family decided to take different courses of action at this time, but they would keep the hubby's information on file for use later. It made me think, why aren't I on the list? So I did some research, and unfortunately there aren't a lot of places in the US to sign up, none near me. In order for me to do I'd have to pay some money, which at this time I can't really do. So I think the next time I'm in Seattle I'll see what I can do to put my name on the list.
So now to the title of this post. The hubby decided to talk to his work partners about this and the decision he had made, since he would have to take some time off, if he were to go up and donate bone marrow. I was shocked and baffold by their reactions. None of them really agreed with his decision, although they would support him. They said if they were in his shoes they woouldn't do it. Are you kidding me? Especially since most of them are parents, I thought they would look at the human side of it and think what we did, if it were my child I'd want someone to help, instead of saying sorry it's an inconvience for my and my life, too bad, better luck next time. If I was a potential match for their child, they'd probably ask me to help. Or even if their child needed blood, they probably ask me to donate, since I have O negative which all blood types can have. I was just amazed that they felt the way they did. Am I strange for feeling the way I do? Would you help someone out you didn't know, even if there was some recoop time?


Heather said...

I'm surprised at your husband's co-workers. I would totally expect to applaud your husband's efforts to help someone. I think it is so important for people to be willing to do these kind of things. It is so worth one week out of your life if it means saving someone elses. My hat goes off to you and your husband to do what is right if your help was needed. I know that family and the individual would be forever grateful. Even if they don't need your help now, I'm sure that just knowing that there is someone willing to help if need be, is a blessing for them.

dustin said...

Your hubby hasn't seemed to be the healthiest person lately. He has had pain in his abdomen for quite some time that keeps him up at night and we all worry about him. His partners and I only suggested that we wouldn't want him to do it if there were risks that it would interfere with his family or work obligations that would effect the long term. Its really just a cautious message from the uninformed who don't know what this kind of procedure would do to him. He has a family and friends who count on him for a lot so we want him to be okay.

melnel said...

I recently thought a bit about this when I realized my sister had signed up as an organ donor. It's something I've meant to think and decide about, but haven't taken the time to. I discussed it with roommates and friends last week, and I think more like you do now--when you can help so easily, why not?

Stephanie said...

That is surprising, and good for the hub.

I don't know that I would do it myself, but I would support anyone who wanted to. (Including the hub).